Fall is here, y’all. Do you know how much I love fall? The weather starts to cool down, the leaves change color, and kabocha squash and pumpkins take over my dreams.
Saturday night I went to a dinner party. Some of my favorite people gathered around a feast of butternut squash risotto and candied sweet potatoes. I made a kabocha squash coffee cake with a maple glaze. We talked and laughed and, raising our mugs of warm mulled wine, toasted the changing seasons and welcomed fall. I was warm and toasty, surrounded by chosen family, wrapped in a cocoon of love. And I realized something amazing.
My wish came true, y’all. My life is overflowing with magic. In a few months I will be 30 and I am the happiest I’ve been in over 2 years. I moved to Seattle because I had a feeling I belonged here. I was right. In the time I’ve been here, I’ve been amazingly fortunate to gather an incredible chosen family, people who make me happy and challenge me to be better, be different, try new things.
The season isn’t the only thing changing. I felt a shift on Saturday night, while I was snuggled on the sofa with Jasers and K, Boz and Barc, comparing socks and discussing whether my dress was a first date dress or a third date dress. My adjustment period is over. When I moved to Seattle, I was scared and excited, tentative and unsure. I did the best I could, experienced some sadness and some miracles, made mistakes and learned how to cope with the fallout. But I’ve gotten my bearings now. I have a healthy sense of realism. I know shit happens. And I know I’ll deal with it, even if I don’t know how, at first. But shit is temporary and contentment, happiness, magic? Those are the things I choose. Those are the things I hold with me at all times.
So it’s time for a shift. It’s time for more. It’s time for challenges and exploration. As I move forward to my 30th birthday, my goal is to end my 29th year, easily my most difficult year so far, better than I was when it started. I will be better. I will be stronger. And I will give back the love that has been given to me. I will send my magic out into the Universe and into the lives of my chosen family.
And most importantly, I will LOVE.
I’m ready for this shift. I’m ready for scarves and orange leaves, hot tea and caramel rolls, pumpkins and halloween costumes.
Because fall magic? It’s really just the very best kind of all.